Attached is My CV for Your Sexual Consideration or My One Week Affair with Online Dating

I'm rarely optimistic, but for some reason when I created my Okcupid.com(OKC) account I thought, "Hey this might actually work out in my favor. Hell, I know and have met couples that have actually gotten married after initially meeting online."

So I crafted a profile. Careful not to leave out some key elements like my enjoyment of video games. I know this can be the Kryptonite for some girls but I'm not interested in compromising with some girl over hobbies if she's going to be intolerant of mine. I waved my freak flag proudly, I wasn't interested in just getting laid.

I searched through the matches that OKC gave me, looking for that perfectly realistic mate. After a little poking around I found someone; a seemingly unpretentious, normal, educated, cute girl.

From this point I hemmed and hawed about whether or not I was going to actually send her a message. Afraid of rejection certainly, but also apprehensive that this might not be for me. The awkward interaction via text, and, god willing, an even more awkward meeting in person.

I wrote her a message. The message was of medium length, proofread, contained a sort of check list of things that we had in-common and the golden question: "Will you go out on a date with me?"
Coffee, Lunch, Dinner; I left what kind of date up in air and in her court. I hovered for an extended moment over the send button and pressed down on my left mouse button.

I then waited.

I saw that she logged in and out without responding. This frustrated me as we were obviously a good match. The compatibility questions that we had both answered were almost identical, she and I had more than one similar interest. What gives?

In a quest to find answers I stumbled upon "guides" on how to make a profile as well as etiquette sending messages and requesting dates. One of which clearly stated in bold letters, "Don't ask them to meet in person until the third message!" This is not what I did. I assumed that people were on dating sites because they wanted physical dates, not just a forum to message ePeople back and forth like an extension of facebook with more anonymity. These guide writers suggested using the "shotgun approach" when messaging girls, sending messages to as many as possible so that you have many dating options. That's all well and good if you aren't picky or don't really care about a potential long-term relationship but for my purposes it seemed a little trite.

It was obvious that meeting girls online was exactly like looking for jobs online, and looking for jobs online is probably one of the last things I want to spend my time doing next to getting my nuts tapped repeatedly with a melon baller.
Very few people actually care about the you the applicant, it's all about how you present your CV or in the case of OKC, ePersona and how non-creepy or hipsterly clever you are in your profile.

I'm not gonna play that game. I'm a nice, considerate, moderately attractive dude with a retractable beard. I don't need to play that game. What I need is to find some similarly positioned female(minus the beard) that will not play that game with me.

FML.